UFA presents:
EMIL AND THE DETECTIVES
Based on the novel by Erich Kastner
Produced by:
Screenplay:
Directed by:
Starring:
The detectives:
Also starring:
The film's premiere was held on December 12, 1931 at the UFA theatre on Kurfurstendamm in Berlin.
I'll teach that boy a lesson.
I wonder where he is.
The train's leaving in an hour.
Ouch!
You let the boy travel to Berlin alone?
Yes.
He just needs to be careful.
- What about all that traffic? - I'm not a kid anymore, Mrs. Hubler.
So there you are.
Now get ready.
Warm water, Mrs. Tischbein?
Thanks.
Everything's laid out and ready.
Now, Mrs. Hubler...
Mother, can you tell me who invented the sunday suit?
Why?
That guy ought to be killed!
I'm sorry.
- Here you are. - You should finally get a hair dryer!
She probably also wants a perm for the 50 pfennig she paid.
Now, Emil
here's what's most important.
Here are 140 marks:
One 100 mark bill
and two 20 mark bills.
Be careful and put it in your pocket.
Tell grandma not to be mad, we were a bit short of money last time.
Now it won't climb out, Mrs. Tischbein.
That's good.
What else do you have to mind?
First, I mustn't get my suitcase stolen. Second, I mustn't spoil my suit.
And third?
To mind the cars in Berlin.
Eighth, I must brush my teeth at least twice a week.
I surely will!
In Berlin you get off at "Friedrich Street".
Grandma will be waiting for you.
Give her the flowers right away. Pony Hutchen will also be there.
Pony Hutchen?
Wait a moment,
I think I forgot something.
- What've you got there? - Something for Pony Hutchen.
Very nice.
Come on, put it in your pocket.
Now we'll have to hurry,
or else we're going to be late.
Come on!
Mrs. Tischbein...
Hello, Mr. Jeschke.
Just a moment.
This is about something rather unpleasant...
Yesterday your shop was still open at five past seven.
- If that happens again... - Officer, you know how hard it is these days
- to earn just a couple of marks. - I'll let it pass this one time,
but next time...
The monument has been desecrated.
One of those rascals...
If I catch him
he'll get ten years.
Ten years in prison?
Enjoy your holidays, young chap!
Where are you off to?
- To Berlin - To Berlin!
There's still a free seat left.
Here, the flowers.
Give my regards to grandma and Pony Hutchen.
It will be done immediately, Mrs. Tischbein.
- And please, for the sake of God... - ...take care of the money! I know.
Send me a postcard when you get there. And behave well.
Don't overwork yourself and don't get ill. I'll be back soon.
- Goodbye. - Goodbye.
Excuse me, is this seat taken?
No, sit down.
Thank you.
Thanks, young chap.
So where's this big trip taking you?
To Berlin.
To Berlin, really?
So you're on vacation?
Yes, but I've also got business to attend to.
Business?
My, my!
Your first time in Berlin?
You'll be in for a surprise.
They've buildings that are 100 stories high.
It's true.
100 stories.
It takes three months to get to the top by foot.
So you just take the lift.
Each lift has a kitchen.
So you won't have to starve on the way.
And if you want to get to another district
then you just go to a post office.
They'll put you in a tube
and shoot you to wherever your business is.
And if you're ever broke in Berlin
you just go to the bank,
pawn your brain
and receive 1000 marks for it.
A person can survive two days without a brain.
And you'll only get it back if you pay 1200 instead of 1000 marks.
You must've pawned your brain, too.
Why tell the kid such nonsense?
Please be so kind and hold this. I'll have to get off now.
Have a nice trip, young chap.
- Bye. - Bye.
Oh dear!
You've left something.
Thank you, thank you.
All aboard!
Now you can sleep through till Berlin.
No, I won't sleep.
All aboard!
I'm sorry.
No harm done.
Do you smoke, young man?
No, not yet.
How about some candy?
Thanks.
EMERGENCY BRAKE
Oh my God!
The money!
Thieves!
Anyone else without a ticket?
"Kurfurstendamm"
Emil should arrive any moment, grandma.
Here you are, uncle.
Where's that rascal Emil?
Excuse me, wasn't that the train from Neustadt?
Yes, it was.
We're waiting for my cousin.
- Im pleased, I'm pleased. - Why does that please you?
What a strange person.
I think it's time to go home now.
Who knows what Emil's been up to.
Like I always say: boys nowadays...
I don't like this.
Well, I'm terribly tired.
Sit on the handlebar, grandma. I'll get you home.
You silly girl!
Who's that honking all the time?
Me, of course.
Never heard of Gustav and his horn?
You're not from around here, right?
I'm from Neustadt. I'm coming straight from the station.
From Neustadt? That explains the silly suit.
Take that back or I'll smack you so hard your horn will burst.
Don't be offended. It's already taken back.
Come here.
What are you doing?
I'm sure I can fix you up.
Like this.
Lower your head.
We'll have to unbutton that.
- Now you're looking proper. - Thanks.
What are you always looking at?
I'm observing a thief.
Huh, what?
All I hear is "thief".
Come over here.
Do you see that man over there? The one with the stiff hat.
The one that's eating the eggs?
- Yes, eggs he paid for with my money. - Why with your money?
Look, this is what happened:
I was on my way to my grandma in Berlin, having 140 marks in my pocket,
and that guy was sitting right in front of me.
140 marks?
Really?
Cross my heart!
This is just like in the movies.
Tell that copper, he'll bust him.
A copper?
Better not. I got into some trouble back in Neustadt.
I get it.
So what's the plan?
Don't know. Let's just follow him.
This whole thief business is great.
We must help you.
- I'm Gustav, by the way. - And I'm Emil.
Now I'll get us some backup. You'll see.
Everybody stop!
What do you say now?
Colossal!
Ladies and Gentlemen, this is Emil from Neustadt.
You already know the story.
Over there
sits the swine that nicked his money.
On the right edge, the one with the bowler hat.
We must retrieve the money, understood?
Quiet!
We'll take over from here, Emil.
We'll deploy messengers:
Two at the kiosk
and two along the road.
The rest of us will have a pow-wow.
Don't get too close!
Finally something's happening. Right, boys?
Now I'll introduce the gang to you, Emil.
First of all: the professor.
This is little Tuesday
and his famous dog, Zeppelin.
The one with the scooter
is called Krumbiegel.
A nice guy.
He speaks only indian.
Because of his scooter
we call him "the flying deer".
You said it, chief.
Enough with all that introducing.
Let's get this rolling!
First the ignition!
First we need some money
to get started.
Everyone give what they got.
Wait, I still got some.
Hold the cap higher.
Don't pull.
Hurry up.
This'll be our start-up money.
Emil,
Gustav,
Mittenzwey,
Gerold, and me,
we're the five detectives.
We'll take up pursuit as soon as the thief moves.
The rest of you stay here on call,
waiting for further instructions.
Quiet!
Can't I come?
I'll be the sniffing dog.
I'm really good at barking.
And I can crow.
And I'm really good at sneaking.
Stop being childish!
You stay here, got it?
Who of you's got a phone?
- What's your number? - Bavaria0579.
Everyone, memorize the number!
To know where the detectives are, just give Tuesday a call.
But I'd rather come along.
No arguing! You'll stay by the phone!
We also need a password.
I suggest our password be "Emil".
Password: Emil.
The check!
Damn it, how long do I have to wait for you?
I don't have forever!
Here's your dough.
Knucklehead!
...10 Schuhmann street.
My regards to Pony Hutchen and grandma. Tell them not to worry.
Get going, detectives! Off with you!
This place is swell, professor.
We'll stay here.
Mittenzwei!
This'll be our headquarters.
Inform dispatch right away!
- Yes. - Come on, go!
This is dispatch.
Password: Emil. This is Mittenzwey speaking...
Our Headquarters is in front of the Hotel Biedermann.
Biedermann?
The...
siege...
The s-ie-ge...
...has begun.
has...
be...
gun.
He drove away in a car, but we went straight after him.
He won't get away.
Did anybody else call?
No.
No one called.
I'd really love to come with you.
And by the way:
this place is boring me to death.
- Password: Emil. - Password: Emil.
How long might this siege last?
Maybe the whole night.
For God's sake,
what'll grandma say?
OTTILIE TISCHBEIN: SEAMSTRESS
Emil, where have you been?
I was really, really worried about you.
- But grandma, that's not Emil. - What?
This paleface has eagle-eyes.
Stop talking nonsense.
Where are they?
Here they are, grandma.
Now, who are you?
I'm the flying deer.
The flying deer?
But who sent you?
The great gang's chief.
Oh my God.
Maybe something's happened to Emil!
Don't worry, the great Manitou is watching over him.
Is he at least unharmed?
You say it, pale dove.
Here's his suitcase.
He also sends you these flowers.
And...
this letter.
Let me read it to you, grandma.
Dear grandma, I've arrived in Berlin
but can't come to you yet.
I mush take care of something important first.
Mush?
Ah, it's "must"!
I'll be there as soon as everything's in order.
Best fishes...
Fishes?
That boy has a terrible handwriting.
Give my regards to Pony Hutchen. Yours, Emil.
You tell me immediately where Emil is.
He's on the warpath.
I want to know where he is!
The chief has spoken!
Unbelievable!
Sorry, I left my mustang.
I'll take care of everything, grandma.
Pony Hutchen...
- Pony Hutchen! - Wait, I'll come with you!
On the warpath?
I don't like this.
This is dispatch.
The password?
Alright.
Headquarters...
Just a moment.
Biedermann... Hotel Biedermann. In front of the Hotel Biedermann.
Biedermann. With a "b", as in broomstick.
Yes, that's right, Biedermann.
Yes.
Who is it?
Password: Emil!
Pony Hutchen!
Emil, you little rogue! Grandma's at home wrecking her head...
So I came to check on you myself. I also brought something to chow on.
Great!
- Don't push! - Leave something for me!
- Guys, don't be like that. - One after another. - You should thank her.
Thanks!
This is delicious.
Thank you.
The Indian already told me the whole story on the way.
A fine mess you've gotten yourselves into.
A fine mess? No!
These are the detectives: This is Gustav and his horn.
You've already met the Indian.
This is the professor.
This is Gerold.
And his name is Mittenzwey.
Please, gentlemen, don't be bothered by me.
Thanks.
Come, sit here.
I stick to it! One of us has to get into the hotel.
Guys, I've got an idea.
Good heavens, what are you doing?
- Want to earn 1 mark? - 1 mark?
Yes.
Listen...
Lend us your uniform, Emil over there shall wear it.
Max!
Maxi!
Where's that lout now?
Max!
Where's he got to now?
Take those two kummel up to room 8.
Over there! Don't you see?
Well, I'm really excited.
Not as excited as me.
Shut up.
Stop playing with fire.
What's going on here?
Damn it, what's that noise?
Leave me in peace!
What's going on?
A signal.
The enemy's in number 9. Something big is going on.
Good heavens!
So...
What else? Hey?
Hello!
Hey, you!
Did he hang up?
Hello!
He hung up on me.
The enemy...
enemy...
is in...
number...
Wake-up call at 8 a.m.!
My money.
My money!
Watch out, he's coming!
I made it!
- Here's the money. - Hurray, the money!
Where?
But it's not there.
- It's not there. - Try another compartment.
There's nothing in it.
Damn it!
So where is the money?
I'll be going home now.
A good girl belongs in bed.
Grandma couldn't take it if two kids were missing.
- Good night, gentlemen. - Wait, Pony, I got you something.
Where'd you put my jacket?
It's right here.
Hold this.
How lovely!
Did I break it?
I'm really sorry.
Don't bother. Grandma says broken crockery brings you luck.
Thank you very much.
Let me see.
But it's broken...
Mind your own business!
- Good night, gentlemen. - Good night.
Goodbye.
Give my love to grandma.
Do you like her?
- Yes. - A lot?
Yes, a lot.
- You're not supposed to say that! - Why not?
- Because I forbid you! - You've got a screw loose!
Be quiet!
Why don't you shut up?
Idiots!
You can settle your personal matters later.
This is about something bigger.
- I suggest... - What!
- ...we smoke the peace pipe. - Do it, then!
If only we found the money.
- I don't want my mother to... - Afraid of her, huh?
Me, afraid of my mother?
No.
She's constantly working,
and still we don't get by.
For me, losing those 140 marks
is equal to you losing a million or even more.
You and your mother seem to be very close.
Colossally.
But that doesn't make me a mama's boy.
Whoever doubts that will be thrown against the wall.
Look, he's already falling over.
I say we all hit the hay now.
Mittenzwey!
A message for dispatch:
Tomorrow headquarters will be on the alert at 8 a.m. sharp.
- Yes. - Yes.
Come with me, boy.
You come with me.
- You can crash at my place. - Nice!
Take care.
Thanks.
Password: Emil.
Password Emil?
He's dreaming.
Come on, my boy.
Maxi!
Damn it, Maxi!
I forgot the milk again.
Yes?
Come in.
- Here's your breakfast. - I didn't order any breakfast.
Idiot!
But sir, you should really have some breakfast.
My apologies.
Out!
Or I'll show you out!
You can leave the water here.
What insolence!
- Good morning, professor. - Good morning.
Where are the others...
- ...for God's sake? - Watch this.
Good morning, Emil!
Colossal!
Pay attention, he's about to come out.
Thirty
forty
fifty, sixty
seventy...
How may I help you?
- Goodbye. - Goodbye.
I...
Please change this 100 mark bill for me.
Stop!
Wait, Mr. cashier, sir. The money's stolen.
Stolen?
What's that, little man?
That's my money, 140 marks, which he stole from me on the train.
How insolent!
That won't help.
- What a scoundrel! - Quiet! Be quiet!
You'll first have to prove that it's really your money.
I swear.
Unfortunately, that's not enough.
The money was attached by a pin.
There must be pin-pricks.
He's right.
Here are the remaining 40 marks, just count the pin-pricks.
Take it slow.
ASSAULT!
There's no doubt
that this money belongs to the boy.
Watch,
now it's happening.
What's your name?
- Schulze. - Schulze?
At the hotel he claimed his name was "Grundeis".
He carried two passports. One under the name of "Kiessling"
and the other one under the name of "Markus".
I wonder what his real name is.
He's got as many names as you've got freckles.
Take that hat off!
Didn't you hear him?
Off with the hat!
Damn, what a mug!
Your scar seems quite familiar.
Get this man to the records department.
See you, gentlemen.
Better not.
Well, you've done a great job.
Like real detectives.
Now, my boy, here's your money.
- Don't let it get stolen again. - No way.
Come in.
Excuse me, superintendent.
- Am I right here? - Pardon?
I'm here regarding Emil Tischbein.
- Grandma! - My boy!
Mother sends you her regards and asks you not to be mad.
We were a bit short of money last time.
And if you ever ride a train, don't take candy from strangers!
Don't act like this is all new to you.
Put your head in there.
I got him.
That's Mitlinski, the bank robber from Hannover.
Wait a moment, officer.
- ...we kept on running after him. - And I followed him by bike.
Then he entered a bank...
Wait a moment, detective.
That's him.
Mitlinski, a bank robber.
May we leave now?
Goodbye.
- That was swell. - Definitely.
- What a strange fellow. - Did you see his ears?
I almost telegraphed your mother.
Thank God you didn't.
Anything could've happened.
Gladly everything turned out well.
Do you wanna go for an ice cream?
- Yes, sure. Are you coming too? - Yes.
Come on.
For me?
Yes.
Nice.
It's like the one Emil gave you yesterday.
But his was broken...
I made that box especially for you.
Pony Hutchen was delighted at the butterfly.
Really?
This one I caught myself. And this one...
is very rare and exotic.
Where are you?
Starting again?
Leave me.
Emil, what's this all about?
Emil Tischbein!
Come here.
You've really had a stroke of luck.
The thief you arrested is a real bank robber.
You'll receive a reward of 1000 marks.
1000 marks!
What?
A thousand marks?
Not just our school
but the whole town of Neustadt is proud of our little hero,
Emil Tischbein.
Quiet!
Don't forget the others.
All my friends who assisted me.
No, little Tuesday is the true hero.
He had to stay home alone, sitting by the phone all night.
You got me a hair dryer!
- Look how marvelous it is. - Come on, open it.
I'd rather wait till later.
Now, Emil, who'll get Pony Hutchen?
- I propose a duel. - Alright.
Wait.
Why don't we draw lots?
Okay.
- Heads or tails? - Tails.
- So you're saying tails? - Yes, tails.
I've also got something to say.
- So who's it gonna be? Me? - No, me!
I'll maybe tell you in ten years.
But as long as you're still rascals, I'll take you both.
Three cheers for Emil and the detectives.
THE END